The Reluctant Skeleton

Halloween at work found me sat surrounded my team-mates who had really made an effort...

....while I hadn't bothered as usual. Problem is, I just don't have the hands to be able to make a costume, and don't have the money to buy one.

I also have a famously grumpy demeanour too, if my brain chemistry is that way inclined. Which first thing in the morning it usually is, although I've tried to change my morning routine to improve things. My team-mates are very understanding, and had actually sorted out a skeleton costume for me to wear to the various Halloween costume parades and photo-opps we were having today.

Sadly, it was a skeleton made for a rather smaller puddle of putrescent flesh than myself. About an 8 year old one, judging by the fact that as soon as I tried to clamber into the darn thing, it began to stretch and rip along the seams. I was fastened into it as if I was wearing a corset, at which point it popped open at the back like a flaying victim. It was also extremely tight and painful in rather intimate areas.

As for the mask it was so small I could only see a tiny tunnel of the world out of my right eye, and thus spent most of my time bumping into people and things as we went to our first parade.

We actually had a fun day, but I regret not making better efforts! No parties for me tonight! Or indeed, any night. I must be old.

Si

All text and images copyright CreamCrackeredNature 31.10.17

Upon the Mantlepiece of Curiosities

In what I laughably term my office, or perhaps study would be a better word, there is a mantlepiece. It mainly acts as a storage area for odd bits of junk, but I like to refer to it as my "mantlepiece of curiosities".

And amongst the foreign coins, wooden rhinoceros, sofa of cats and a furry magnolia pod, sit these two folk.

They were both turned up at different times in my parent's roof.

The larger one is definitely a blackbird, they used to nest in an opening overlooking the garden many years ago, when I was studying for my GCSEs out in the sun. The smaller one I'm not sure about. It has a finch, or possibly spuggy beak, a relatively larger eye socket, and a less pronounced breastbone-keel.

They are so lightweight, and ephemeral, it is unreal. They can be virtually blown along my mantlepiece museum, and feel more like they are made of dried grass rather than bone. How on earth they can support musculature powerful enough to enable them to fly is a mystery, if my muscles were strong enough for me to fly my shoulders would shatter and I'm rather sturdier than a tiny ball of feathers.

I used to be frightened of all skeletons as a child, I still remember a nightmare I had when I was 5 or 6 featuring test tube eggs and girls opening up their shins to show me their bones. Even now, I'm not a huge fan of skulls...

Si

All text and images copyright CreamCrackeredNature 21.11.15